It's Ok Thursday

  Ah, yes Thursday, we meet again. So let's explore what's OK with me this week! IT'S OK.....   To chug sip cranberry juice out of my coffee mug so my co-workers don't see (oh the joys of womanly things) To keep said giant jug of cranberry juice in my desk drawer for easy access To finally call the doctor and admit in defeat that you are sick, infected with something and need meds! To be needy! To want to come home and do nothing but sleep. To dream of a mental health day (working on the taking of said day) To crave pizza for dinner, but not want the calories so go to the grocery store and buy Lean Cuisine pizza to satisfy said craving (and about $27 worth of other frozen things so you do not have to cook for a week) (This is what happens when M travels) To gasp... skip a workout b/c let's face it, I was just too tired That I still need a mommy every once in a while That I do not love my job every single day, or minute or week for that matter To still think twitter is kind of pointless sometimes To not jump on every new social media bandwagon To tell people no (again working on this one) To want someone to send you flowers To need constant reminders that you are loved, cherished and needed. To engage in retail therapy (hello it was on sale!)     Dish, people, what's OK with you this week?

 

 

When it Rains

I live in Texas, the DFW area to be exact. Its crazy weather central here. For example, yesterday I left the house to 60 degree weather, enjoyed a high of 76 at about 2pm, then the rain came. And by rain, I mean lightening, thunder, hello tsunami downpour. Which left the temperature at a mere 55.

Fast forward to this morning, and by morning I mean 4am when my power went off. Yes off, people, off! Scared the beejesus out of me and all. And hello wind chill of 37. Yes, 37 and no heat. So there I sat huddled in bed, with a whimpering dog, an aching back, cramps, headache, and no heat. All because its rained, or that I live in Texas, either way no a happy camper.

Did I mention that back, the cramps, and the overall less than sunny disposition? Oh ,I didn't... well add that to the  Jekyll and Hyde Texas weather. Yes, Monday morning I awoke to a wonderful surprise my body decided I needed another infection of some sort and off the the pharmacy I ran for some meds. Tuesday was not much better. I had/have the worst lower back pain in my life. (As in I am currently sitting at my desk at work with a heating pad behind me). Excruciating pain, so much that my butt went home yesterday, and worked from the couch with said heating pad attached to my back and pain meds galore.

So, back to the weather. See I have this lovely, wonderful, loving pup named Chloe Elaine. Yeah innocent looking huh? Well, have I  mentioned how M ruined her for all eternity? Yes, M aka Mr. Clean, Mr. OCD has rubbed off on my dog! She cannot do her business unless it perfect conditions. She will not get her paws wet, let alone step nae a paw into a puddle. She will literally jump over a puddle to avoid the splash. She will take the most insane route to find the perfect place to pee! And let's not get started with the thought of being dirty. So, imagine how fun taking her out to pee in the rain and puddles may be. It was 1. cold 2. wet 3. I felt like death; and 4.  MY DOG WOULD NOT PEE!!!

Defeated by a dog.... So, if you are in the vicinity of me today you should either 1. run or 2. bring cupcakes.

How's that for a rambling Wednesday?

I'm an Insomniac

To say I have a sleeping problem would downplay the issue. The truth is, without being so tired I literally cannot keep my eyes open, or without the aid of my friend Tylenol pm, I do not sleep. Now, I'm not saying I cannot eventually drift into a state of slumber, say while watching a movie, or working, or ya know 3pm (anyday), what I am saying is that at night, when my body is telling me to sleep, my mind is going like 90 bazillion miles an hour, and sleep is a myth.

So, I've taken to the Tylenol pm, a book and hot tea to induce the zzz's. Yeah I know probably not healthy and I should seek other remedies that are umm less risky. Sorry kids, doesn't work, I've tried. But in my line of work I need the zzzz's to ya know make it to and from the office each day.

Side note, the sleeping aid, yeah totally makes me talk, mumble, rumble and say some random things in my sleep. Apparently I'm rather amusing whilst I slumber from said Tylenol. I've thought long and hard about taping myself in the middle of the night to capture the wondrous grunts I produce, but that requires way more forethought than I possess, so you will just have to take my word (and those who have heard it).

So, this lack of good sleep takes it toll on my poor ragged body. I find myself engaged in championship nap sessions during the weekends. I want nothing more than to curl up with my pup, blanket and a horrible Lifetime Movie and sleep. Yeah, its what us cool old people do now, sleep away our weekends.

Gone are the late nights, bar hopping, heck I want to eat dinner at 6:30 because Ive been up since 7am! Take me to the Fur's 5pm early bird special and call it a night. 9pm movie, laughable, chances are I'll fall asleep within the first 30 minutes and then get home only to toss and turn all night. Oh, the joys of a stressful job and a mind that just cannot turn off. Help, I'm an insomniac!

Trying Something New

I could recount all the mundane details of my weekend for you, as most bloggers do each Monday, or I can be real, honest, and raw with you my readers.

Things have been less than perfect in my life as of late, I'm sure you all have noticed the posts that have been less than sunshine and lollipops. Truth is, life is not all dandelions and ice cream with no calories attached. Truth is, marriage is work, work is work, maintaining a healthy lifestyle and weight is work, personal happiness is work. But the key is, nothing will work in your life if you are not seeking and finding personal happiness. YOU alone are the key to your life being a well-balanced machine.

Often we, and I mean women, try to find happiness by adapting to what we "think" men or the world want or expect of us. When we date we do what he likes to do, we wear what makes him happy and often forget what we need to make ourselves happy. We do this to attract me, or friends, or well just attract about anything. We look for what is missing or for approval in our personal lives through other people.

What we should be doing is focusing inward. Looking for personal satisfaction and growth. Having inner happiness and peace. When we are honest with what we need and want for ourselves then we can make good wives, mothers, mates, friends, etc... When we achieve personal happiness we excel in all other endeavours. When we listen to our inner needs, we become whole.

So, I have been trying something new. I have been looking for happiness from within. Removing toxic people and thoughts from my brain and life. Putting God first, letting him guide me from day-to-day has allowed me to see things from a different view. I'm not saying its easy and there are times when I would rather do what is easy or fun rather than what is right and good. I stumble daily. I falter and cry. Some days are good and others bad, but its all part of a journey.

I have put myself and my needs first. What do I like to do? What makes me happy and fulfilled? What relaxes me and rejuvenates me? What books ease my mind or make me think? What drives me?

I challenge all of you to try something new. Put you first, put your life into perspective. Take a long look in the mirror and ask yourself if you are happy with you. Because you cannot make anyone else happy, you cannot fix or change anyone else, but you can make YOU the YOU.

Thoughts on a Friday

There have just gotten to be so many link ups for Fridays that I have decided to try each one each Friday. So this week I will be joining happies & crappies! But do not forget about Leslie's Confessional Friday or Messy.Dirty.Hair's Fearless Fashion Friday! But for me, this week, I need to dish!

Happies: Federal court case set for trial Feb11th? SETTLED!; Convinced boss to move into 21st century and review docs electronically!; breakthrough in my personal life; latte every morning; lost 4 pounds; cute new clothes; 70+ degree weather in Texas!; the fabu chocolate chip cookies that arrived in my mailbox yesterday courtesy of my Tay!; realizing that I am a grown up and I do not have to answer to anyone except myself and God!

Crappies: Funk at work where I tend to stare into the distance and lose about an hour; traffic... everyday of my life (seriously get with it NTTA); the fog this morning and people using their brights in it; dealing with emotions that have been building for 30 years; that the weekend is only 2 days....

But, its Friday y'all! So enjoy!!

It's Ok {Lawyer Edition}

Yes, its time for what's ok and this is the lawyer edition! Link up and let loose.

It's Ok....

• to bill for meeting with people in your office about a case and bill the entire time you sit there
• to be "the infantry"... as in take marching orders and not question the chief
• to totally scare the bejeesus out of your 1st year associate friend over lunch by venting
• to vent to other lawyers about the trials and tribulations of practice
• to doubt that this is what you want to do your whole life
• to HATE document review
• to loath discovery and love it at the same time
• google law before you go down the wrong path (or rack up a huge westlaw bill)
• to tell poor unsuspecting souls not to go to law school
• to copy and paste (I mean come on why recreate the wheel)
• to ask questions and expect answers
• to be leery of your clients
• to say no when you cannot do any more work
• to close your door, put your head down on your desk and nap for 10 minutes

WILW

It's Wednesday, mid week, mid-winter, its just slumpy today...I realized that we passed the most depressing day of the year this week (the 21st) and things should start looking up, right? I mean the days are getting a tad longer (hello sunshine whilst leaving the office), the temperature was like 70 here yesterday and well I mean all I see around are hearts and love (though a lil overkill I think). So, don't let this glorious day pass you by and see what I am loving this Wednesday!

1. Platform Shoes! Yes, I  have given in to the platform. I recently added these two my collection:

2.  Hot Yoga! Yes I went back. I talked about this last year after I discovered my obsession. I took a small hiatus from it for the summer, but now I'm back! It was also recommended for me to return from my doctor, who said I needed to relax. Well, this is it! I feel so refreshed and relaxed afterward. There's just something about the focus is requires to hold the poses that allows me to free my mind (at least for 80 minutes).

 

3. The Nude or Understated Eye - I accomplish this with The Urban Decay Naked, but this works too!

the understated eye by sherbetfountain featuring bare escentuals

 

4.  His Need Her Needs - Its a book every person, couple, etc... should read. It's Like Men are From Mars, on steroids and has really opened my eyes to a lot of things about relationships, communication, and my needs as a woman in and out of relationships. Get it, read it, live it...

 

 

 

That's it for this Wednesday! If you need me I'll be knee-deep in document review, but then relaxing away in yoga this evening!