Well, I did sleep some post doctor visit. But then my body ok brain said work!, text! argue with people because that will make it all better.... said no one ever. Why is it when you feel awful life decides to just beat you down. You are busy at work, arguing with people, home improvement projects attack you and people decide to announce they are having babies. ( I know this sounds dumb, but for those of you around a while know this is still hard for me).
But, life just isn't fair. See fair is this word that was made up by the English language to terrorize the masses. We are taught when we are young to share, take turns, let everyone try it... in essence that life is fair. Even now kids get trophies for just participating and no one loses in sporting events. Hello, we are lying to the children of America, cause guess what? LIFE IS NOT FAIR.
I am 30, single, sans a kid with two dogs and house that has all but sucked my savings dry. This is not what I was taught by Mrs. Lingo in the first grade when she said you can make all your dreams comes true (cause who dreams this scenario?).
Yeah I know, count my blessings (and I do) I am employed, healthy (except for the gallons of mucus sliding down my throat), own a home, surrounded by wonderful friends and family, and have a wonderful guy who is pretty smitten with me--what more do I need/want?
So, as I sit here, feeling life death warmed over, I prayed. I prayed not for myself, but for my future. I prayed that I would be patient enough to let my selfish thoughts subside and let God take control. I prayed for peace to live in the moment and this current season of my life. I prayed that someday someone will see in me all the things I fail to see in myself. I prayed that my friends would continue to hold me accountable and speak truth into me. I prayed for my future--not for how I wanted it to turn out, but that I would let it unfold on its own.
OK Im gonna play Ms Brightside here: You get to see meeeeee this weekend!
ReplyDeleteAwwwwwwwwwww feeel better sweet sweet friend! I love you!
ReplyDeleteI hate that life continues to try and teach things aren't fair....it's like hello, I know, grasping the concept already!
xoxo
You are not alone friend - I need to be praying that prayer too. Because patience is a virtue that I DON'T have. And I have a big tendency to try to tell God how I think my life should pan out, ha. As if that's ever worked for me.
ReplyDeleteI hope you feel better soon sweet girl. Cuddle with those pups and just let yourself relax - you've tried to do too much in the last few weeks and I think this is your body's way of telling you to slow down and take it easy for a couple of days!
I need to be praying that prayer as well. It's very hard. extreme hard. But something has to give right? I hope you feel better! Mucus is a lawyer ladies worst enemy!
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