The Grey Area

I know I have said this before, but law school does not prepare you for real world practice, per se, nor does it prepare you for life. Law students are taught that there is a right answer. It's either A-E; true or false; or some well-typed canned answer to an essay question. Law students are constantly obsessed with getting it right. There is the perfect way to write a memo, law review comment, or outline a fact pattern. No professor is looking for the "it depends" answer; they do not want the grey area. But the truth is, the law is all grey area, and so is life for that matter.

I know I have only been working for a little over 2 months and have only been licensed for a week and a few days, but this is probably the best advice for any law student.... THERE IS NO RIGHT ANSWER!

Exhibit A: I get an assignment from a partner to research this and find case law to support it. Well, guess what.... there is no answer to your question. There is no case law to support it, and in fact no one has even scratched the surface on this issue. I admit, I freaked out. I kept stressing and called the Westlaw line to get some advice. I thought maybe I have overthought this issue (which would come as no surprise), perhaps I have missed typed a connector.... Nope, no my gut instinct was right, the answer does not exist. Then why was I so afraid... because I was programmed to find that right answer. To compose an eloquent memo outlining the applicable law and applying it to the facts. Finally, I turned to my trusty fellow associate and he told me... its ok. Just simply tell parnter that you could not find the answer to issue x and how would he like you to proceed. Simple, huh? Still I feared him telling me I must be wrong, go back, keep looking! But low and behold, he did not. He simply said "I looked too and couldn't find anything." Wow, all that worrying for nothing. Another wise friend told me that you'd be surprised how often in the law the answer is "i have no lue".

I have also learned that in life, there is no right or wrong answer per se. It's funny, this is the argument I have most often with the hubs... I struggle with the quest to be right. I get that is not about actually being right, it about having my thought and feelings validated. To me right, it the perfect solution, knowing how to solve the problem, arriving at the destination because I navigated us there. I have been programmed to do this. Law school taught to pursue the quest for knowledge, to find the right answer.

Too bad this does not work out so well in life. Life, just as the law, is filled with grey area. Its finding the balance between what you client wants and what remedies allowed by law; between doing things your way and satisfying you MIL. There is a fine line in both law and life between being right and conceding that good is good enough, when knowing when to settle and when to take it the jury! I have to become more focused on a happy medium, rather than going for the win. Settling a case is not losing it, its just knowing when to do what is best for all the parties involved. Just as law requires a cost/benefit analysis, so does life, and marriage.~ The Illegal Blonde